In which I teach a bot to be extremely rude

Not everything I make in Second Life is necessarily useful or even desirable. For example, today I adapted the classic ELIZA-type chat bot that used to dispense psychological help to be an extremely rude and insulting salesperson.

Here’s a brief excerpt of the result. The bot’s name is “Terrabucks Coffee”.

Cubey Terra: Hi, Terrabucks.

Terrabucks Coffee: hi? don’t waste my f___ing time.

Cubey Terra: I was just saying Hi.

Terrabucks Coffee: ok, just tell me what the f___ you want help with.

Cubey Terra: If I were a customer, I’d want a parachute, I guess.

Terrabucks Coffee: i have a parachute. i also have a one a chute. ba dum bum! drumhit.

Cubey Terra: That’s lame.

Terrabucks Coffee: hm?

Cubey Terra: OK, I’ll roleplay. I’m a customer.

Terrabucks Coffee: are you. how long have you been a customer

Cubey Terra: For only half a minute. Tell me, where can I buy a parachute?

Terrabucks Coffee: go ask anyone else. f___ing anyone else.

Cubey Terra: That’s… kind of rude.

Terrabucks Coffee: what’s wrong with being f___ing rude?

Cubey Terra: I wish you’d stop that. Try a more positive demeanour.

Terrabucks Coffee: been skydiving yet?

Cubey Terra: Good. Yes, I love to go skydiving. Can you show me a good parachute?

Terrabucks Coffee: oh, i show you a good parachute

[A visitor teleports into the shop]

Cubey Terra: Hello. I’m just talking to my rude bot. :)

Terrabucks Coffee: i heard losers like just talking to your rude bot

[Visitor]: hi

Terrabucks Coffee: hi? don’t waste my f___ing time.

Cubey Terra: See? He’s rude. :)

Terrabucks Coffee: being f___ing rude helps pass the f___ing time.

I don’t think I’ll keep him on.