If you keep a bag of chips in your desk’s file drawer, do you file it under “C” for “chips” or “M” for “Miss Vickie’s”? Or maybe it should go under “Y” for “yum”.
Jane retires from blogging
A long-time link in my blogroll, Escribitionist.com, is closing down. “Jane” wrote a particularly interesting and personal blog that will be missed by many.
Thanks for the witty and entertaining bloggings, Jane, and good luck with your future projects.
Cubicle survival kit ideas
Someone recently found this site by searching for “cubicle survival kit ideas“. That strikes me as a good idea for a topic, so here are some items that I’d like to see in a cubicle survival kit:
- Chocolate and salty snacks.
- Strange Japanese snacks.
- A coffee mug without the corporate logo or cute little cartoons.
- A coffee dispenser.
- Penguin-shaped juggling balls.
- A comfey cardigan sweater and a pair of sneakers. Hey, Mister Rogers was onto something there.
- A chair that ISN’T so uncomfortable that it crushes your tailbone and puts your back into spasms.
- An endless supply of frozen mini-pizzas, pasta dishes, and instant noodles.
- Rare and inpiring works of art to decorate the cubicle. No new-age photos with corporate-speak messages under them like “Teamwork” or “Imagination” or “Leadership”. I’d rather look at paintings of yak vomit.
- Cold beer. For Fridays after 5:30PM only, of course. And lunctimes.
- A Lay-Z-Boy rocker-recliner in green vinyl. A drink-holder is a must.
- An X-Box and widescreen TV.
- A masseuse.
- A small teleportation device for slipping out to the movie theatre without being noticed.
- An excessively polite, gold-tone robot who will do your work when you use the teleportation device. Must be fluent in the language of load-lifters and ‘vaporators. *
I expect HR to pay attention to the suggestions.
* I apologize for that gratuitous allusion to Star Wars. It won’t happen again.
A week in fast-forward
Now, the thing about spending time away from the office is that you have to pay for it. I arrived this morning to fifteen trillion e-mails. I proceeded to wade into them. No, that’s not true. Before wading into them, I first paid a visit to my old friend the coffee vending machine. I actually had to make my own coffee while I was away, believe it or not.
Reading my e-mails evokes all kinds of emotions. It’s like watching the events of last week unfold in fast-forward: five days of successes, failures, communications, and miscommunications all compressed into a couple of hours. It’s nerve-wracking to see e-mails flying back and forth discussing how to do things without me. At first, it’s flattering to think that things don’t work right without me. Then it occurs to me that things moved along just fine. Everyone is perfectly capable of coping with the extra workload for a week.
Shhh. Don’t tell HR. “Indispensible”. Tell them I’m “indispensible”.
My new baby
It was a truly magical moment when by baby emerged into the world. I get all (sniff)… I get all choked up when I think about it.
Here she is…
And her first words–oh it’s so sweet–her first words were a friendly suggestion to register my copy of Windows. Isn’t that adorable?