What does a cubicle-dweller do on his spontaneous vacation? Re-install Windows while wearing a silly hat, of course.
Who says I don’t know how to have a good time?
Mushrooms, anyone?
Taken at Lighthouse Park, West Vancouver.
Show me what’s in the bag
I’ve been caught shoplifting… in reverse! On my way back from the drug store, I walked into Taiga Works at 8th and Yukon to check their prices on Gore-Tex jackets. As I passed through the entrance, their security alarm went off. The clerk eyed me suspiciously.
I was holding a very small London Drugs bag — obviously nothing from Taiga. Joking, I laughed and said, “Well I guess you caught me smuggling products into your store.”
Well that was a mistake, because the clerk had no sense of humour. Or any sense of reality. She immediately demanded that I give her the bag so that she could search it.
I looked at her in disbelief for a moment. Why? I asked her. What did she think I was doing — attempting to plant merchandise on her shelves? And besides, the bag was too small to hold any Taiga clothing.
I’d rather not, I told her, but she insisted on searching the bag. I should have just walked right out of the store then.
Fine, I said. Look. I opened the bag and showed her the memory card reader that I’d bought. No, she didn’t have a right to see it, but I just wanted to settle it. After all, she didn’t seem to be one with strong reasoning abilities, and I just wanted to look at prices. I turned to browse the racks.
Then she asked me, How did you leave London Drugs without setting off their alarm?
Pause.
Well, I guess your alarm is more sensitive than theirs. She frowned, unconvinced. I’m sure that, in her mind, I had obviously just ripped off a memory card reader (and the little bag too), and now I was going to make off with some camping supplies.
I browsed for about half a minute, but I wasn’t in the mood to shop — especially not under the watchful eye of Brainless behind the counter. I walked out, which triggered the alarm again. I half-expected her to tackle me on the sidewalk to check the bag again.
I think I’ll buy the jacket from Mountain Equipment Co-op. The MEC staff are friendly… and they don’t treat their customers like criminals.
Verisimilitude
Do you ever have a Monday morning where you feel like Darth Vader? Not the evil, heavy-breathing Vader, but the sickly humpty-dumpty Vader under the mask.
Yup. That’s me on the left.
Catprin: tailor for cats
This Japanese web site offers costumes for your cat:
Ever imagined dressing up your lovely cat into a fabulous beauty? You don’t have to dress her everyday, in fact she might not feel comfortable with a dress on for days. Just dress her up only on special occasions like her birthday, takes a photo and that should leave you lots of memories and fantasies.
“Fantasies”?? This seriously disturbs my wa.
They helpfully provide step-by-step instructions on their use:
1. Dress her up. Cheer or yell, do whatever you like to enjoy the moment with your family.
2. After you are enough with your joy, take a photo! Take some poses and leave her some cute photos!
3. Remove her clothes and give her a hub, say “Thank you!”
It’s only 3000 ¥ to dress your kitty as a schoolgirl. Don’t delay, call today! (shudder)
(Thanks, Agent Q, for the link.)