Day 7: One week without television.
I think I have this addiction licked, and the solution has nothing to do with sock puppets. After all, licking sock puppets just gets lint on your tongue (as it turns out).
For the solution, I returned to my surrogate television — the cardboard box with the rectangular hole cut in the front. It was a reasonable puppet theatre, but Worf found it a little cramped by Klingon standards and kept killing his crewmates.
To help him out a little, I cut another hole in the back. And then it struck me. I could see right through the box. I could see out the window!
Yes, suddenly I was watching a show more interesting than any episode from any Star Trek series. Except maybe Amok Time, where Kirk and Spock fight with lirpas on the planet Vulcan. That one’s cool.
Anyway, because my surrogate TV was next to the window, I could look right through it and watch the street below. I saw cars going back and forth. I saw the neighbors outside the house that really needs a coat of paint. I saw stray cats fighting for territory. I saw people walking dogs and picking up the poop in little baggies. I was watching reality TV.
Now all I have to do is wait for the neighbors to start doing wacky things like setting up aluminum ladders next to power lines or jumping off the roof into a kiddie pool. This should entertain me at least as long as it will take Geordi and Data to finish converting my microwave into a holodeck.