Rockpoint PD, tonight at 10:30

Once again, don’t forget to watch Rockpoint PD tonight at 10:30 on the Comedy Network. That is, if you get the Comedy Network, watch Rockpoint PD. Otherwise, um… watch something else.

And if you don’t have a TV, you could do something else. Read a book, for example. Or go for a walk. Talk to a loved one. Or something. For crying out loud, what am I, your social planner?! Figure it out on your own!

What was that? I’m a hypocrite for telling you to watch a show when I have no TV myself? I can’t believe you would suggest such a thing! Trust me, if I had a TV, I would watch nothing but Rockpoint PD every night… if it were on every night. Oh, and the Daily Show, which is on right after Rockpoint PD. That’s good for a laugh. And maybe Buffy and Enterprise too. But that’s all, because if you watch too much TV, you’ll turn into a nut who gets into arguments with himself. You will! It’s true!

What? You watch VIP? Oh for—… I don’t even know where to start with that. You obviously have absolutely no taste in TV at all. That’s it. I’m not talking to you anymore.

A lesson in the etiquette of serfdom

I couldn’t get anywhere near the bank. I just couldn’t do it. Since CIBC began closing its branches, the remaining ones seem to be in places without any convenient parking. This is a serious problem if you want to make a credit card payment.

For fifteen minutes this morning, I circled block after block trying to find a parking spot. Around and around I went shouting curses at parked cars, but there was nothing for me but no-stopping signs, taxi-only stops (full of taxis), and bus stops full of people experiencing deja vu as I circled around for the millionth time.

Then I understood my mistake. You can’t drive to the bank to make a payment. They prefer you to approach from a distance on your hands and knees.

2002 Worst Manual Contest

Technical Standards, Inc. has posted the results of the 2002 Worst Manual Contest. My favourite is the Sliding Bicycle instruction sheet, in which it states, “Discharge the product by the way of the opposite installation sequence” and “Be careful not to let your fingers got squeezed, when installation and discharge”.

Thankfully, my manuals didn’t show up in the list of winners this year.

Media sharks are closing in

Warning: ranting ahead. Please use caution.

Premier Gordon Campbell, mug shot. Haven't you seen this picture enough already?The sad media feeding frenzy continues to shred Gordon Campbell’s career. You know it’s out of control when a front page story on the Vancouver Sun is about the wave of anti-Campbell merchandise featuring the very mugshots that the media itself distributed. You can buy coffee mugs, lunch boxes, t-shirts, aprons, and beer steins all featuring Premier Campbell’s now-infamous DUI mugshot.

So tell me… why is this a front-page story? Anyone who’s heard of Cafe Press knows that you can pretty much buy a coffee mug with anything you like on it. Any minor event in pop culture or politics usually leads to a whole slough of Cafe Press merchandise (like a frisbee with Ellen Feiss on it, for example). It’s a non-story, inflated to front-page material. Kind of like Campbell’s arrest.

Don’t get me wrong — since Campbell got into office, his policies have been kind of loony. For the most part I vehemently oppose what he and his party stand for. Outside of his job, however, he appears to be an upstanding guy. And now he made a really dumb mistake.

Fine. Let the judge sentence him and after that, he’ll have learned his lesson, paid his debt to society, and it will be done. That’s what the courts are supposed to be for, aren’t they? So enough already.

If you want to remove the guy from office, do it legitimately. Vote him out in the next provincial election. Or better, catch him doing something really underhanded, like selling BC Hydro.