Restaurant review

Situated at the corner of Robson Street and Bidwell Avenue, this Scottish restaurant emphasizes fast service over all else. The interior was spartan, favouring plastic surfaces and easy-to-mop floors, which seemed to glow under the blue accent of the fluorescent lighting.

The menu’s theme is processed animal product, from which the chefs coax a stunning variety of main dishes. The combinations, though limited, will appeal to the most fastidious processed-animal-product connoisseur: many dishes feature a sandwich with fried (then microwaved) ground and a garnish of potato sticks, deep-fried in beef tallow.

Even vegetarians and the health-conscious can enjoy the Scottish fare, as the animal content of the meal can be reduced to almost nil by ordering the dry, soy-patty sandwich and by avoiding the deep-fried potato sticks. The soft drinks may also contain beef tallow in trace amounts, but the head chef, Ronald, was not available to confirm my opinion.

The Scottish theme is enhanced by the clever menu, which names the dishes in the Gaelic language. Exotic names, such as McChicken, McMuffin, and Big Mac, can stir the heart of any red-haired, yellow-jumpsuit-wearing Scot.

Next week, I’ll continue my reviews by sampling the personal favourite delicacies of the reigning monarch of the Land of Dairy, who apparently owns a great many restaurants.